3/4/09 LB Picasso

*Pic of girl with three boobs (dressed) was here

*Portion of Post Deleted for Lap Band Book

I’ve been thinking on and off about my tummy artwork (that’s what we artists do) and how I could make it funny without insulting my doc that he’d forget (he DID tell me to remind him).

I was reading some blogs lately that got me thinking; maybe I could write a joke, or a funny poem on my belly to point out my port placement…welcome to ‘my kind of crazy’…yes, this is what goes on in my head. People’s incision photos online (eeewww), got me commenting about making different ‘connect the dot’ pictures with my incisions and washable markers and posting them here (NOT). But maybe I can do a dot picture for my port site?

So, why am I making this confession and sharing this now? I had second thoughts…what if the Sharpie isn’t sterile, or it messes them up and they refuse to do surgery because I wrote on myself? I’m not crazy enough yet to call my surgeon and ask. Today “The Doctors” was on as I was doing the laundry…the plastic surgeon on the panel was talking about how a Sharpie is his best friend for surgery! Hey yea, we’ve all seen those Dr. 90210 shows where they’re marking all over the woman’s bodies with a Sharpie. I’d forgotten about that! So I ran to the TV to listen. The question was about whether a Sharpie is sterile or not...WOW…my very question! Apparently Sharpie’s have a lot of alcohol in them, and even if they weren’t sterile the Betadine they smear all over you sterilizes everything. OK, I’m going for it! Now I’ve got artwork to plan! My practical jokes always backfire on me, so I hardly ever attempt them…they’ll either think I’m nuts or laugh…we’ll see what happens…if I wake up with a third boob, it backfired.

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In response to Comments/Suggestions:

- Spew Alert...LOL! Porthole...Ohhh! Good idea!

- WARNING- Possible Spew Alert! Yea, a pic is perfect...one of my Dr. Suessy poems he might have a little trouble with...

Left goes the port,
Or I'll take you to court.
Sew me up pretty,
Wanna be itty-bitty!

- When I asked people where there port is and where they'd put their port if they had a choice, I saw several women who told me their doc attached their port to the breastbone right on the sternum (right thing?)...they described it as a third boob. I don't think anyone gets fat there...no more low cleavage tops for them!