I'm on a new journey to pay-it-forward & with the support of my Groupies/friends...

I'm writing a LAP BAND BOOK!!!

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

8/31/10 New Do's

DD and I got our 'back to school' hairdos, neither one of us is going back to school (DS2 goes back Thursday), but we're kind of in the habit, and the coming of Fall just always means new hair and clothes...we'll have to get working on the second part.

Here we are in her dressing room (best thing I ever designed in this house...just a long vanity counter with a sink in her closet, off her can see about 1/2 the space in the pic...but I swear she lives in here). Nope, my 'do' isn't very new this year, but I did bring back the swoopy bangs. DD took the plunge and got about 10" off...maybe a foot.

She's had long hair since before we moved here 10 years ago and now has a long 'bob''s adorable...a little shorter and layered in the back.
She was away with girlfriends for her birthday last week, but we celebrated the other day. Oh, and keep your finger's crossed. She's been interviewing a lot, but had a one this week that would be a great fit for her locally...just waiting to hear about second interviews.

Friday, August 27, 2010

8/27/10 Drivel Scribbles- Title?

*Post Deleted For Lap Band Book

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

8/25/10 Only One Week Left to Post! SWA Contest

OK all you Scale Whores (Gigolos)...get off your scale for a moment and participate in our semi-annual meeting. If you haven't heard yet, this one is an 'interactive' meeting where you can tell or show (a pic will do) others why/how being a Scale Whore is a good thing (it's been the best tool in my box, well besides Fluffy and Phil that is)...put 'SWA' somewhere in the title...then let me know (send me a link/date of your post). How EASY (if you don't have a blog, send it to me and you can be a 'guest poster'; and if you want the complicated version, just click on the challenge pic on the right)...hey, you're already talking about your scale every day, how much easier can it get?!...and listen up...

...there are prizes involved! Yes my Whores (you know who you are Kath), in the spirit of my love for homemade crapfts (Lena, this one's for you!) I am bedazzling some lovely prizes for the three top winners (comments to your SWA post are the votes)...and today I am rolling out peeks (to raise your competitive know you have one Sandy).

So here's the bedazzled just screams 'You're a Whore!', don't you think?! I've created a new SWA logo with the rhinestones...look closely...yes, there's the big W, and got it! No Gilly!, I was not trying to make a vajayjay!!...I was shooting for a tiara we're all queen's of our know........nevermind. I'm ready to glue these babies on...and I'm not liable if they pop off and poke out one of your spouse's/partner's hmmm("eye's" just doesn't seem to cut it...or does it?)! Yes it's a thong (don't worry, it's a Lg....although why these aren't 'one size fits all' I have no clue...who gains weight in their butt crack?)!

I think I need some heart rhinestones on the rear...hmmm pretty small...

...nope, not going to do it...these d*mn things are uncomfortable enough without rhinestones in your crack!

Now, don't you want to participate in the challenge? I know you B*tches BOOBS (no yes, I'm not jealous...crapfting with thongs must bring out my potty-mouth...I don't know how you Whores wear these every day!) want to take these to wear to Chicago?!

Let me see a pic of you 'hearting' your scale...or a post about your scale weight's easy peasy (Don't forget to let me know).

I think we all need to talk someone (Andrew) into doing an SWGA blog so she he can win these (Oh d*mn, he's still on vacation, how dare he! How about Jack Sh*t?...he's on that scale hourly I'll bet).

*Portion of Post Deleted for Lap Band Book

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

8/24/10 Hello BG, It's The World Again...

OK, either the World is sending me 'messages' again, or I'm just a gullible sucka whose getting punked again (Erika, is that you?!). You all know I don't get 'subtle' fact I don't usually get 'hit me over the head with a 2x4' either. Oh NO, it takes me having many horrific PBing moments before I finally am sitting there thinking (and re-chewing my regurgitated food in the middle of a fancy restaurant) 'Hmmm...Wasn't there a rule about chewing well BEFORE you swallow?'

So there's a point to all this somewhere...oh yeah, 'messages'...stick with me, I swear this will get good at some point...well you know I've been taking somewhat of a hiatus from the writing...not all by choice, summer, 3 kids, life happens, and it should....but next week when the rest of the kiddies are back to school I've actually been looking forward to finishing up the book proposal and starting the process of sending it this week, now that things have finally started to slow down, I decided it would be my 'pull together all the motivation I'll need, collect proposal layouts, and start getting my plans to finish the book together' week.

Here's what's happened...OK, first of all I received a wonderful gift...I'll remind you that recently, one of my sister's and I had been discussing Dr. Suess/ fact, I had mentioned to her that at one point I had looked at a vinyl lettering quote, like she has up in her kitchen (they are like rub on stickers), and I was looking at my favorite Dr. Suess quotes to go in my hall upstairs (on the way into my office/our Hobby Room). Fast forward about a week and I get this same vinyl letting/rub on quote in the mail...I excitedly called my sis (not there) and left a thank-you message...a week later or more I hear back that it wasn't from her...HUH?! Mystery gift?!!...I finally solved the puzzle and it's from my good friend and LBer Diane. OK, she's been so busy (working girl), and then I left for vacation, kid off to college, life again, that we haven't had time to discuss this, but it's freakin' me out...did I mention my "hall plan" to her?...I think not!...messages from the world?!'s the quote:

Too cool for words...just WHAT I needed, WHEN I needed it! Now I have to repaint the hall before I mount the words (10 years later, it's time to be repainted, thanks for that motivation too), but it's going up as soon as I paint (I'll take some after pics to show you), thank you know me so well (and I hope you get done working soon so we can talk)!! It will inspire me daily as I walk down the hall to the office to write to the best of my abilities (I would put it over the computer area as you suggested in your note, but those walls are Hunter Green...I'm thinking the black wouldn't show)!

Now get ready for 'messages from the World' 2 and 3.

So Monday morning as I'm pulling up info. on proposals, I took a moment to check my email...hmmm...someone from Lap Band Talk...and what's this?! Although I've run across 'advertisements' on Lap Band Talk (and a few who have put advertisements as comments on my blog/deleted), I've never been directly solicited, until this week. I really thought that my first 'solicitation/request for product endorsement' would come through this Blogger site as it's more 'out there' in the world and all that (and I've seen others here get 'endorsement requests'...and I'll be honest that it turns me off when people actually do them). So this request came through LBT, not Blogger...very vague (complimenting me on how my transformation is one of the best he's seen yet and asking if he could use my pics for a 'major campaign'...OK, I was happy it wasn't a product endorsement request), new member, from a marketing firm, so I was very wary. After looking up the marketing firm and a few emails back and forth I find out they want to use my before/after pics and a testimonial from me about how my life has changed for an add campaign...for...wait for it...the Realize Band! Me?...I chose the LB/Allergan! although I'd do anything to help pay this forward and help promote the Band, I can't do a campaign for the Band I don't have.

I'm typing up my 'so sorry, can't do, I have the LB/Allergan' email to the marketing firm guy when a new message pops up in my email...also through Lap Band's from a health journalist who is writing a short article for the LB/Allergan site about things we can now do after getting off weight (she'd read about my Grand Canyon trip). If it wasn't for the fact that I hadn't yet sent my email telling Mr. Marketing that I don't have a Realize Band and couldn't do this, I would have thought these two things were connected and he'd given my name to the journalist. But still; Coincidence?! You know me, I asked. Yep, she (Hi there! Yes, I looked you up too...she's a very legit and well published/award winning a health magazine and she's written for them...also 'O', Amy W., Oprah didn't call me next LOL) assured me today it was just coincidence...and so I'm looking forward to doing the interview (and I'll keep you all posted on the 'article'coming out this Fall).

The World is sending me messages again...with a 2x4...Yes, I could take this as 'LBT sold my name to a bunch of people' (including my friend Diane), but remember, I'm an optimist and my rose colored glasses are gigantic...I'm taking all this as 'Messages from the World' just when I need them that doing the book is the right thing to do (being a newbie's like being a newbie Bander...lots of doubt...there are days where you say 'WHAT WAS I THINKING?!!!'). So I've found new faith and belief in my 'messages' that I'm really going to be able to help other Banders with the book and I'm off to get the proposals out and hopefully finish the book!

The book, for me it's like my some point you just have to believe that you were meant to do this and that it will all work out. You just have to believe in yourself first.

Friday, August 20, 2010

8/20/10 Funny Guest Blogger Today (and a bloopers vlog)!

My guest blogger (why YES, that IS a pair of boxers he's using for a scarf (he was on his way to the shower), and a flashlight for a cigarette):

DS2 is my funniest one...he makes me laugh all day (I about peed myself laughing last night when we were playing a game/Scene It, and he and I were on the same team)...and remember, I married his Dad for his sense of humor, so that's saying a lot. Anyway, I showed him my shark pics awhile back and he read my blog and told me that my 'This Bites" blog wasn't funny. When you turn into a 15yo nothing your parent's do is the least bit funny. He said there's only one thing lately I did that made him laugh and he told me to tell you...but I'm too up his messes... he's taking over my blog as 'guest poster' for the day to tell the tale (Speaking of which, you haven't forgotten about doing an SWA Challenge post have you? Remember, just tell/show us how being a Scale Whore/Gigolo is a good thing and send me a note letting me know about the post (or 'guest post' on my blog) by Aug. 31, that's it...prizes will be awesomeness). So this is what a 15yo thinks is funny...I'm scarring my kids in all kinds of ways LOL...and I reserve the right to have the last word (me)...and to spellcheck (don't miss his attempt at a vlog...the effects got way too fun, and the bloopers at the end).


Hello Internet people. My Mom didn't tell me that she had surgery on her stomach. She lied to me (here comes Children's Services now) that she had a hernia surgery, which I forgot about (until I reminded him of the hospital overnights and told him about the LB...OK, almost a year post-band). So many months later, when she would regurgitate mucus and other mysterious slimes, I began to become disgusted and would hide under a pillow and start yelling 'La la la la' so I couldn't hear the death burps that would signify that she was going to explode (yes, at the beginning I would run to the bathroom, but it was happening so often before the unfill that I got lazy and stayed...OK, not so fair to those that we're also trying to eat I see) . I, of course, thought that she was bulimic (he didn't really think that...drama King).

I would drink out these orange cups (We have a stack of these orange plastic cups in the kitchen...I think I got them after Halloween) and I would leave them around places and my Dad would always take them and put them in the dishwasher (DH is always 'stealing' our cups out from under us while we're still using them...whenever he starts the dishwasher he needs every last thing in it first...he drives us all nuts when our cup disappears), so I took a sticky note and wrote "*my name*'s Drinking Cup" and stuck it to my cup of water.

I went downstairs to play a few video games with my Dad and then I came upstairs and took a drink of water out of my cup and then I noticed there was another sticky note on the back that said "Mom's Vomit Cup" (Why YES!, the orange cups are my go-to cups for PB's...which was happening way to often before the unfill, and hasn't happened once since). I made the most disgusting face of my life and I turned to look at my Mother to see her trying to conceal her laughter and she was making her 'old people laugh' (hisssss), where they can't breathe (it's just asthma...I never laugh that hard...*hissss*) and all they can do is make the exhale noise and their face turns red (nope, my face is tan baby, it's my 'BEST'). This is by far the only funny joke my Mother has ever told (that day). I snickered (he couldn't breath he was laughing so hard).

The bloopers (I lost it with the steroid forehead and 'You make them strong, we make them Army strong'):

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

8/18/10 Animal House

It was a VERY long and tough day yesterday...the photos will help tell the tale. After the long drive, we walked in to the attic room at the frat house that DS1 will be sharing with two other guys...

There was guy sleeping in the bunk bed... 2pm...

...on a Tuesday...


After 'Sleeping Guy' (DS1 explained that 'he likes to sleep a lot'...uh huh...does he really think I'm buying that?) exited (not one of DS1's new roommates...thank G*d) we met his two roommates (who haven't moved into the room yet...and didn't look like they just woke up)...really nice is a Senior (forgot to ask the other one), so I took that as a good sign that he hadn't partied his way out of school...yet.

Then we looked around...Trust me, the pics don't do it justice...'Sleeping Guy' is moving out tomorrow (his parents are coming to help...I'd love to be a fly on the wall) and his stuff was everywhere on the floor and surfaces...literally. I'm so mad I forgot to get a pic of the floor where his 'closet' broke. There are no closets in this room so he bought a two rod garment rack (the same one we bought DS1...Uh-Oh...We're sending supplies in a care package to tether it to the wall) and the remnants of it were all over a 10' x 10' area...rods...clothes (I'm still not sure if any of them were clean...even the ones still on hangers)...empty hangers...everywhere on the floor...mixed in with lots of trash.

So we took a look around at all the trash and mounds of 'stuff' (I'm being VERY generous with that word) everywhere (you could hardly walk) and all I could say was 'OMG!' (over and over again...until DS1 snapped me out of it with 'Mom! It's a Frat House!'...Oh yeah, WHAT WAS I thinking?!! D*mn DH for having been a Frat boy!) took everything I had to hold it together and not grab my baby boy and go running from the house (if I'd seen even ONE bug, it would have happened)...I was happy to see the hardwired smoke detectors, sprinkler system and fire escape stairs.

Apparently this attic room is the largest bedroom (it's bigger than it looks in the's a huge room) at the frat house so it becomes the 'party room'....yay.

All DS2 could say was 'WOW' and 'My EYES!, My EYES!'...Children's Services is going to be knocking on my door any minute now to take him away from me...I've scarred him for life. Here's DS2 checking out the party set-up...(I caught him later playing one of the guitars on a couch...all I could think was 'AHHH! He's sitting on that couch!!! You don't know where that couch has been!') Oh, and this was when we first walked in and before one of his roommates brought in his couch...making that now 5 couches in the party area...they were talking 'stadium type seating' at that point (I think 'Sleeping Guy' is taking a couch out...yay).

Then we shoved 'Sleeping Guy's' 'closet' and desk over to one side (you can see 'Sleeping Guy's' bunk on the left that he was sleeping 2pm...on a Tuesday...with the bottom bunk completely broken off...oh, and look at the shelf of booze bottles above his head...explains a lot about his name don't you think?) to make a corner on the other (I'm officially dubbing it the 'non-party-side'...that's my story and I'm sticking to it) of the room for DS1. See that's totally cracked and broken...with shards of glass on the floor right next to DS1's corner (we'll be sending some plastic and tape in our 'care package')...kill me now.

Then we 'swept' the trash and other grossness (you don't even want to know) out of his corner...let's just say his bare feet should never touch that floor...they would stick...permanently.

Then we set up his bed (Hells NO!... It's a bed/mattress we got him.) and his oak desk we brought from home (the desk we bought him on Craig's List has a tall cabinet and wouldn't work with the knee walls in the attic room). His couch, coffee table (he made) and mini fridge we placed on the party-side.

And four hours later...

Here's the 'After'...bed on big risers so there's room for tons of stuff underneath; 3 giant bins of food (Don't want my baby to starve), a small bin of cooking tools (for all the food), a small bin of kitchen cleaning supplies (that apparently will never get used), a bucket and cleaning supplies for the room (that apparently will never get used), a small bin of every kind of medicine (I reminded him of the antibiotics I put in there...just in case his feet ever touch the floor), and a totebag with laundry supplies (that apparently will never get used). He hung his 3 posters over his cover up the myriad of screws everywhere and random boards still attached to the walls (I'm guessing from former lofts, but what do I know...see the board way over his head...I made DH remove all the screws that were around his pillow area). There's his 'closet' (oh, and look, it's a towel rack and bookbag rack too!) at the end of the bed and his laundry hamper (that apparently will never get used).

See how happy he looks? We bought a few drawers and a two square bin holder to add/stack to his book cabinet from last year (since the Frat house can't afford closets...just big screen TV's and sand for basement 'beach parties'...OK, there's the up side I've been looking for...there could have been sand on his floor too). Look there's an alarm clock next to his lamp (that BETTER get used!). Apparently everyone in the house (except 'Sleeping Guy'...who can sleep at any time...even 2pm...on a Tuesday) hangs black out curtains around their bed space so they can sleep (you never know when there might be a party going on in the other/party-side of the room...kill me now...Do you think I could chain him to the non-party-side?).

Just past his 'closet' is the desk area stocked with supplies (also on the non-party side); he brought his desk chair up last weekend and has to still go and retrieve it. We hung his batik, the bulletin board and a dry erase board (screws were easy to find...yay). And finally, there's some shelves just before the door with a coffee and shower supplies station...and LOOK!...there on the floor! There's an actual trash can we brought (that apparently will never get used).

Yes, I actually left my son in this place (whispering to him not to have too much fun)...and I have the pics (evidence for Children's Services...don't laugh...I'm subpoenaing you all for the hearing) to prove his area was semi-safe and clean when we left. On the way home (after we stopped at McDonald's to wash our hands about 10x) I gave DH Holy He!! for being a Frat boy (trust me, our sorority house was beautiful with Ethan Allen furniture in every bedroom and real closets even, so I'm taking NO responsibility for this), but he reminded me of the day we moved him into his frat house six months after I met him and how bad his room looked when we arrived...apparently I have a selective memory (I'm just hoping I can forget how DS1's room looked...ever).

I don't want to hear ONE word from the rest of you dropping your babies off at college this year and how HARD it was...just could be worse (and for me, it is).

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

8/17/10 I'm Going To College

No, I wish for there's four years of my life I'd love to relive. The van is packed and the cartop carrier is on...we're (-DD) heading out now to take DS1 to Happy Valley. 'Can't wait' to see his attic room at the Frat house...yikes.

Monday, August 16, 2010

8/16/10 I'm Like An Old Leather Couch

How am I'm like an old leather couch you ask? Let me tell you...

I often 'get a bug up my butt' and start 'projects'. I'm always working on a 'project' around the house (DD looked at me last night working away and then looked at her Dad and said 'What makes her get up in the morning and say 'I'm going to label that closet or redo the couches today? She's always starting a project!').

After our company left this weekend I took a deep breath and realized that although summer had just begun for me a few short weeks ago, it was now almost over. I realized that for the first time this summer that I have nothing on my calendar for the next two weeks...OK, I've got two kids to get ready to go back to school, but other than a day trip 'drop-off' at college this week, I have no trips away from home for two weeks...I haven't had that since February.

So how did I celebrate this moment...I took that deep breath and realized that I'm looking forward to September and getting together my book proposal to start sending out...and then I realized that because I've been gone so much of the Summer I needed to get caught up on a few projects that need doing (and so I won't feel guilty about focusing on the writing).

First, I cleaned out my 'closet cabinet''s a deep cabinet in my kitchen that holds a ton of stuff and every time I came home from Mom and Dad's with kitchen stuff from their house I shoved it in there...with company here this weekend I couldn't find anything in there...well, you know my 'almost OCD' wouldn't allow that! Yes, I have a label maker and I'm not afraid to use it!

Then I was on to my leather couches. We have two twin couches in the Great Room that I've been neglecting for a long time...they're about 8 years old and besides the yearly leather treatment they needed, they were now at the point where they needed an 'intervention'. We went to the store to get my supplies and then I went to town. I started with one couch...used the leather cleaner...stitched up any places where the baseball stitching had come undone, ironed patches on any rips in the thin fabric (bottom side of the cushions), opened the cushions and put in new batting and added new fiberfill to the cushions, and conditioned and buffed the leather.

Here's the funny part...after all that work... family is complaining. Apparently, they loved the 'old' couch(es) and it was 'soft', 'comfortable', 'wrinkly', 'relaxed' and 'cushy'...and the 'new' couch is 'overstuffed', 'hard', 'huge', 'stiff', 'awkward', and 'uncomfortable'.

As I fell asleep last night it occurred to me that all those adjectives described the new and old me's as well...I'm now unstuffed and oh so comfortable, relaxed, and wrinkly...I'm like an old leather couch you love...I'm back to my old comfortable self.

Oh, and I'm on to the second couch today...the family will just have to suck it up and do the 'work' to get the couches comfortable again...I'm sure with a little time and hard 'work' they'll both be back to their old, comfortable selves again in no time.

Thursday, August 12, 2010

8/12/10 The Versatile Blogger and Blogs to Follow!

1. Thank you Pamela at "Less Than Fat - The Fantasy" here:

Pam was just banded Tuesday, so pop on over and congratulate her!!

Pam also said I can be a member of the Black and Beautiful club (with my fake tan). I love that she describes 'us' as Chocolate (skin) know how I love that's the color I'm aiming for Pamela (DD was howling that I used almost a whole giant tube of the tanner at the shore...HEY, 'chocolate' takes some doing when you start out 'eggshell'). Thanks sista'!

Pam is in the pre-op phase of her LB process (approved-YAY!)...and Pam, WL, it's not going to be a 'fantasy'! Pamela is a breast cancer survivor (double YAY!) courage in the LB process should NOT be an issue! Thanks again Pamela!

Here are the rules:

1. Thank the person giving the award.
2. Share seven things about yourself.
3. Nominate 15 newly discovered blogs.
4. Let your nominees know about the award.

2. Seven things...let's see, I'll try to make them 'new', but that's hard because I tell everything...hmm BG trivia:

1. I had two 'chocolate' roommates my freshman year in college (one was 'Miss Black Ohio'). They used to laugh at my naivety about black people and it was a great experience (ie. I was fascinated by how much goop could disappear into their hair...likewise we tested me...goop + white hair = looks like you haven't showered...ever).

2. My favorite color was pink when I was was red when I became an adult and then about 10 years ago I switched back to pink...Up until recently my closet was mainly these two colors...and LOTS of black.

3. I've always wanted long beautiful fingernails but I usually cut them very short because I garden so much (they break easily and I was way too hard on them for acrylics...tried it). However, I usually have a beautiful pedicure...even in the winter.

4. I have a beautiful herb garden, but there's only one thing I use from it, basil (you know how I love to cook). I have about 25-30 basil plants and I make pesto and caprese salad a lot with DS2's tomatoes (took basil, tomatoes and mozzarella balls and made a huge casserole dish of this at the beach and it was gone in days). DH cooks with herbs and some of my neighbors have come to harvest when they need things.

5. I have a label maker and I'm not afraid to use it (OK, that one's not so new)...I have labels everywhere...I hate what I call 'rework'...put it back in it's place and my 'almost OCD' is kids think I'm crazy...I am.

6. My two oldest kids and I all have worked part-time summers (not at the same time, she's now retired) for a lady in our neighborhood that made stained glass to sell (something I learned to do a long time ago at our Community Center). I'll have to blog about what DS1 is making right now.

7. I'm a decent artist, but I have none of it hanging in my home. It actually embarrasses me to share it. I haven't painted in a long time...not sure why. Hmm...maybe in my spirit of 'doing the uncomfortable' I'll do a blog showing some old art work.

3. OK, this will help me get some of my 'following' up to date. Dag, this took a lot of time to find, but I found 15 bloggers with less than 50 followers, most have less than get thee thyselves over there and show these Banders some support!

2. Darlin1 -

3. Jennifer *BEING BANDED TODAY* -

4. Brie -

5. Dahlia -

6. Midwest Meg -

7. MissMaryMert-

8. Jo -

9. Karen-

10. Becky-

11. Christy-

12. Thea-

*Thea, I had problems leaving a comment as I couldn't see the whole word verification or scroll down...I'll try again.

13. Nicole-

14. Trixie-

15. Tracie-

4. OK, I'm off to do #4!

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

8/11/10 Cape May

I'm home! Here are some pics of our vacation in Cape May (went to visit DH's sister and her family at their new place).

I figured out, while I was there, that most of my new 'fun clothes' have empire waists and are flowy...most of them I bought before I lost all the weight and I was still in my old habits of buying 'camouflage clothing'...look, they're mainly black too LOL. I wore this with my silver/diamonds everywhere 'gladiator' sandals.
We rode bikes (rented ours for the whole family for the week) or walked miles every morning (just the adults were up that early of course) and we'd stop and get breakfast. We ate dinners out every night but one...they have great restaurants there and we tried three new ones I loved...and I'll pass on the names for anyone who goes there. Here we are after eating at 'Fresco's' (owned by their next door restaurant '410 Bank Street'...also a great place). Try the fried olives appetizer...amazing.

On the beach with DD...see, I wore the bikini!

My tribute to 'Shark Week' on Discovery.
Our last day there it was SO foggy they didn't let anyone in the water until it cleared. The crazy part is that this was at 1pm and it was HOT...even the lifeguards said they've never seen anything like it (it finally burned off around 1:30 pm). Here I am with my SIL and we made some castles and lagoons with the boys (you can see the lifeguard stand in the background that they pulled into the's not very far away from us, that's how thick the fog was and this was after some of it was gone).

Here we are going out to 'Peter Shields' restaurant (on Beach Street)...very fancy old home and you'd never know you were at the ocean (the asparagus/mushroom soup was to die for).

Here's the family on the deck of my SIL's family's new place (you can't see it in this pic, but they have a great ocean view and it's behind me in this pic). We went to 'The Pier House' and sat outside on the patio for dinner. It was the perfect evening (cool and it's on the Beach Street) so we listened to the waves crashing) and a great meal.
I gained at least 5 pounds...kinda surprised me as we got a lot of exercise, but also a lot of 'liquid calories'. I'm not too worried about least today LOL.

I'm off to do the 100 loads of laundry...the SIL/family arrive on Friday for a college visit here Saturday morning (they have two kids- my niece about 9 months younger than DD and she just graduated from PSU, and my nephew who will be a HS Senior).

Thursday, August 5, 2010

8/5/10 Two For The Road

As you read this we are on our way to Cape May...three grown teens/twenties, that I had to get up at the crack-of-dawn...d*mn DH...he's a la-dee-dah 'morning person'...'early start' and all that cr*p. It's like walking up to the gorilla cages while they're sleeping and poking them with a big stick...DH can get them up next trip!!! Does he even know they don't usually get up until at least 10am at the earliest?

So now we're in the jam packed minivan for at least 8.5 hours...I'm sure I'm having a GREAT time by now (pray for me).

It was so much easier when they were little and I could turn on the 'Barney' videos one after the other...that and a dose of Benedryl worked wonders (kidding...about the Benedryl...not the Barney...he's still my hero). That was back in the dark ages when we had the TV with the built in VHS machine tethered and hanging between the front seats in a 'TV bag' was so jammed and got so hot that it burned both DH and my arms next to it. There were no headphones for our three babies, so we also had to turn it way up so that they could all hear it as one child was in the way back. DH and I got the high volume coming out the speakers on the sides of the TV (along with the heat). But it was heaven...Ahhh...DH and I arrived with one red arm with third-degree burns and we were completely deaf for the first day of every vacation, but it was a small price to pay for peace in the I was heaven.

No such luck this time....I'm guessing that right about now I'm hearing 'He's on my side again! MOM!' for about the hundredth time...If I didn't get so car sick (yes, I've tried everything), I'd sit in the back and watch the movies...Built in DVD player, wireless headphones, they can even plug in their gaming systems...but does that keep the peace...nope.

That's when I pull out all the stops and do something we obese people agree will scar our kids for life...

*Portion of Post Deleted for Lap Band Book

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

8/4/10 This Bites!!!

I called my kids down for dinner last night and they came down screaming 'Change the channel!' 'Quick! Change the channel!!' 'Discovery Channel Mom!'

'What? Huh?' I thought nuclear bombs might be going off somewhere...maybe Discovery got the first scoop?! I quickly changed the channel as I'm saying 'What's going on?!!' and then I hear...

'Mom, haven't you heard?!!' 'It's SHARK WEEK!' did I miss that announcement...and look...

...tonight's episode is "Shark Bite Beach" that 'recounts the horrific tales of six people and their shark bite stories'

...apparently we all look like a shark's favorite food from below...a swimming seal (I take some solice in the fact that at least I'm not looking like a beached whale anymore).

And yay...

We get to see the shark sneak up on them as they're frolicking in the ocean...

and...what's THAT? Holy BASS-O-MATIC BLENDER!!!...Is Moses turning the water's red again?!! Dear G*d!! AHHHH!

Oh no you di'nt?!

So it was an hour of watching this...

...and this...

...and did you have to share your scars with me???!!!!

Their website (just in case you're planning a trip to the beach, you can watch whole episodes here

and their add campaign this year asks

'How Are You Celebrating Shark Week?'

Well, duh...

Right now I'm packing up my car...

we're headed to the Jersey Shore in the morning...

We're going to the ocean...THAT'S how!

...I may not get in.



Good timing Discovery, good timing.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

8/3/10 My Secret to my BEST

I thought I'd let you in on something I'm writing about in the maintenance portion of the's the abbreviated version...

Yes, I'm coining yet another LB term here in the blogosphere...because I'm lazy. Goggle didn't even help me this it did when I started using "BDD" (Body Dysmorphic Disorder) way back when I started this journey...and that one took off like wildfire. OK, so my 'Goal Limbo' didn't exactly catch on, but I thought it was descriptive...maybe it needed an acronym or something 'cute'. Like the ones we learned from the boards when we first start..."PB", "stuck", "bat wings", "PS".

We need a term for the skin that deflates after WLS...NO, not stretch marks, the baggy stuff...YES, I KNOW you have a 'panni', but I don't...I have a 'fanni'...or maybe that's two 'fannis'...I wonder if 'fanni' is considered a plural? ...but I digress (go figure)...I need a term for skin on any part of your body that's now loose.

Hmm...let me think...How about ES (Elephant Skin), that's more what it looks like after all...lots of wrinkled skin? Naw that just makes people picture rough skin, like those lotion commercials. BES (Baggy Elephant Skin)? Yeah, that could work!

And now....

...for my secret...

...the secret to making my BES (pronounced Bess) look SO much better?

...alright...are you ready for it?...

...a tan!

Yep, I'm turning my BES into my BEST!!!

It's BES with a 'T' for Tan!

OK, why we pasty white girls (you dark skin gals just always look better) think that gross cellulite hanging skin looks better with a tan is beyond me...but it does, doesn't it?! So, I've decided I'm going to be tan the rest of my life! It's part of my maintenance plan.

But how to go about this? Hmmm...pasty white girl who burns like butter in a frying pan...only one option...

...NO not paint...but you know I LOVE those craft projects...


I opted for the darker color 'Medium to Tan' instead of 'Pasty White to Pale'....I know, I'm living dangerously, but no guts no glory and I only have two days to tan...I'll be looking black and beautiful in no time flat...either that or I'll look like a zebra on the beach with all my lotion stripes...I'd recommend diagonal stripes if you have 'curtain legs' BEST- go across the 'grain'...and vertical stripes, they're SO much more slimming up top...and you can get creative and add 'hair' to your tummy so it looks like a face like mine with with my scar 'eyes' and my new 'frownie' (belly-button)...

OR after I get out of the ocean I'll look like this...

I can't reach my shoulder blades to put the lotion on, so I'm sure I'll look like I have 'back boobs' as well...

'People of WalMart' here I come!

Monday, August 2, 2010

8/2/10 Dad...

Happy Birthday Dad!!! Love You!

Sunday, August 1, 2010

8/1/10 Happy Feet

First, we've received our first SWA Challenge entry here: Check out the toe rings!...or...whoops...those are toe cuffs anchoring you permanently to your scale, right? What a great tip for all our SWA members Sandy!...d*mn, wish I'd thought of that! I wonder how much it would cost to get them installed post scale-build?

I hope you're all thinking of some posts for the SWA Challenge (click on the logo at the top of the sidebar for details, and check out our new page at the top here/one of the tabs next to 'home')'ve got a whole month to work on it, so I'm expecting a lot...informative, funny, clever, thought-provoking, piggie know...your regular, wonderful selves! Oh, and I bought my first 'prize canvas' to start working on when I get's a clue...let's just say I didn't buy it at an art store.

My two-headed toe and I are getting ready for our beach trip and that involves lots of sunless tanner for my pasty white stomach (bikini...yikes) and of course I bought a few, not for in the sand...with a little 'bling' (see, I told you bling was my thing) to keep me warm for those cool nights in the restaurants with a nice bottle of wine...and they're flat for all that walking and shopping in Cape May (heels don't work with all the walking we do there)...the perfect compliment to a casual sundress...there's nothing like fun shoes to make you happy.

Oh, and 'Barney Rubble' feet have start taking new measurements on your feet too (thank G*d my kids all got DH's beautiful long skinny hands, fingers, feet and toes...although they each got a 'slight' two-headed one as well) I needed these (these are 8 or 8.5 and I was in 9 or 8.5W).

These are zip heels and look at all those gems...DH says they look like a Gladiator...'For Sparta!'

These are ruffled and blingy...
Because Diamond's are a girl's best friend...
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