12/8/10 Life Isn't Always Fair

First, thanks for the notes noticing I've been away. I started today's blog just wanting to post some Christmas decoration pics, but I've found I need to begin first with letting some things go. I'm realizing that I've probably been working hard keeping myself too busy, because I didn't want to talk about, or even think about it anymore this (maybe I've been avoiding coming here because I knew I'd have to)…I've lost to much sleep already. I've been trying to uplift myself with Christmas (I LOVE Christmas). As an optimist, I'm not a worrier and can always find the bright side of things, but when it comes to my kids being hurt...it's a different story.

I'm still embroiled in the several craptastic life things I mentioned earlier. One of them took a turn last week and I'm just realizing now that I've been avoiding really dealing with my feelings about it. 

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Anyway...sorry this post was a downer. I AM having fun getting ready for Christmas, crafting (I made a whole mini tree this weekend), and decorating (except for the d@mn Christmas lights that I've spent day's restringing this year...I swear they are just taunting me…flickering a new line out each day, but who the heck likes dealing with the lights?!)...I'll post some pics next! As DD said again this year 'It looks like someone threw-up Christmas on our tree and all over our house!' I'm hoping to about finish the decorating today and we've got DS2's band concert tonight…Fa-la-la-la-la!

10/15/10 Stiff and Tight

D*mn...PCP appointment on Monday (soonest they can get me in). I was just sitting early evening yesterday and my neck started to feel stiff. It ramped up quickly until I couldn't turn my head by the time DH got home...nerves zinging in the upper left back and down the arm. I took some OTC pain reliever, put on the heating pad, and shared some wine with Sandy. I was able to sleep until a little before 3am...up until 7am, then I took a short nap...ughh.

DH thinks this is the result of my ladder fall as I can't trace the neck back to anything else, not even sleeping funny as I didn't wake up with it (and it's on the left side, which is the shoulder I fell on). Geez, I thought I was out of the woods with a few bruises and skinned appendages...four days later? Could it really take this much time for an injury to start? Funny thing was, I was planning to blog about how quickly I recovered from that fall and how that never would have happened 100 pounds ago...jinx. I do have that Osteoarthritis in my neck that was affecting my same shoulder (went to Physical Therapy 1.5 years ago for it). I wish the Doc could have gotten me in today...I may be better by Monday (fingers crossed)...but I may be rifling through the old prescriptions tonight *sigh*. OK, enough whinefest...No worries, it could have been so much worse!

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Have a great weekend all...If you need me, I'll be in my self-medicated coma LOL...come join me...I have whine wine ;-)

9/16/10 Letters From The Dark Side

Dear Tar-gét,

Haven't I been a loyal customer? Wasn't I the one who stood by you and noticed the small changes when all others saw you fading away like Gold Circle and K-Mart? Haven't I single-handedly kept you in business with my college kids, home redecorating, and my many, many, 10% off coupon days cartloads?

Why then, when I needed you most, was in my time of need, and even got DH to come home early to help me, did you let me down?! Didn't you hear me earlier when I said I've been through four days of hell trying to print these d*mn photos at home and now I was finally coming to you to save me?! Did you see my face when I walked in to find ALL THREE of your photo machines were OUT OF ORDER...and the entire photo shop?!

Tar-gét, I'm not sure I'll ever feel the same way about you again...your loss.

Love, Regards,
-BG

P.S. Please apologize to the Manager for me...when he came over to explain that the whole photo shop would be down for at least three days with major problems, I think we scared him a little with my 'stink eye' and DH looking at us like one of us was going to die (I wasn't really going to kill him).

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Dear Walgreens,

I hate you. What the h*ll are you doing training your employees so well! After stopping at four (more) stores we finally found a photo scanner at your store with a cheerful employee ready to help me.

That is, until he saw that I was scanning professionally done photos at which point he spewed out the entire employee handbook on photo copyright laws. Apparently even though the 25 photos that I wanted to scan and change to black and white were taken 10-20 or more years ago I have to go back to every photographer and ask for written permission to scan them...unless the photographer is dead...and he could give me the copyright law sheet that covers how many years they must be dead and how to get permission...blah, blah, blah.

Um...25 photos...each with my screaming babies taken in the back of some drugstore or dept. store that's now been out of business for 20 years?! I'm not sorry for what I said to your well trained employee...actually, I was way too nice...and I'll let you know where you can put that flier on photo copyright laws.

I hate you,
-BG

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Dear Technology,

This is to notify you that I'm officially filing for divorce...irreconcilable differences.

-BG

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DH,

I'm sorry I made you go buy photo paper and ink cartridges this weekend and then after screaming at you and the computer for 4 days (and making your life a living hell), I gave up and made you return them.

I'm sorry I almost gave you a heart attack driving around to stores tonight like a crazy woman on a death mission...oh, and for scarring you looking like a potential terrorist when the employees tried to 'help' me.

BTW the ball is in your court to hook up the other scanner upstairs, download new drivers and photo programs, scan and print...good luck. Sorry I can't help, my divorce from technology will be final soon. Oh, and you'll need to go and re-buy that photo paper and the ink cartridges...yes, again.

Love,
-BG

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Dear Box-O-Wine,

I love you.

-BG

6/25/10 My Wrinkles

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Come on...sing it with me!!! Cracking open the 'box of wine' for you all now...there's no such thing as too early...hold those glasses still GF's...happy weekend! OK, now you're singing...and dancing...WHOOT!

6/15/10 Tuesday Grumblings

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Saturday-
- DH still in Miami Beach from his bus. trip all week (poor thing never had a chance to even get in the ocean...no sympathy...at least he saw the ocean).
- I went the the neighbors for a grad party and enjoyed my GF's and some wine...wore the zebra print halter I showed you.

Sunday-


Monday-
- Migraines suck. That is all.

Tuesday-
- DH left for Denver.

- I have three grumpy children at home and it's gloomy out...I may have to strangle them with my thong if they don't stop whining...my head hurts.

4/7/10 The Black Hole

OK, after grossing you all out (sorry about the Sunkist Amy, really I am...I know how much you enjoy them) and freaking out about what everyone said about their gauze experiences, I decided to 'take matters into my own hands' (6 words that get every Dr. grimacing...I'm a Dr's. worst nightmare). I got out my surgical tools and with a shout of 'I'm comin' in!' and after an hour of yanking and cutting (the gauze, not me...*sigh* I should have married a Dr.) I finally got all the gauze that isn't permanently attached, detached...with only a few drops of blood. The steri strips are still there...as well as a few other (as Camille said) 'gnarly' things that trust me, no one wants to see (your eyes would fall out and then we'd just have chasms everywhere). I have decided to rename this body part the 'Black Hole'...'Belly Button' just isn't fitting anymore. The chasm is deep and wide...it ain't pretty. Let me show you...

Oh, there's that last Easter egg we couldn't find!

No I am not laying down for this pic...I'm standing upright...and the egg does not stick out past the hole at all...and trust me, the egg is NOT in as far as it can go at all...It's a Black Hole, that's why! If I put it all the way in I may never get it out again! (Dr's worst nightmare, remember)...well that and it's too sore for me to push it in. In fact, let me show you that it doesn't stick out.


Ain't nothing cute about this swollen belly Draz. I'm going to need a mighty big diamond to fill this hole (thank you Lori for the suggestion...diamond is the gemstone for April birthdays after all)...I think I'll give the egg to DH to take to the jeweler for sizing...naw, the smartazz knows I'm the Holiday Queen (although Judi is giving me a run for my money) and will just go buy some more 'holiday decorations' for every holiday to decorate my Black Hole.

*sigh* I DO have all the weirdest things happen to me!

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**Update**
As if this day couldn't get any better than getting the gauze out of the black hole...my GF dropped in and look what she brought me (just guess which one is for the kids...I'm still deciding too). She was in Virginia when I had my GB surgery and I think I mentioned hers just came out and I was doing sleepovers with her kids...whe was in the hospital all week for hers (see, things can always be worse!). Oh and she brought me a whole bag of her too big pants to boot YAY!

4/7/10 The Chasm That Is Now My Belly Button

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3/31/10 Bitch and Whine

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3/16/10 Celebrities in WL Denial

WL related things that got me crazy this morning (and it's not even 8:30 am yet as I'm writing this). I know there are many bad WL celebrity examples (did Anyone see Carney Wilson on Dr. Oz recently? She gets a crown for denial and excuses!), but here are a few that got me thinking this morning, because of their denial (and so back up my mantra on how important awareness is):

- This morning on my drive back from the bus stop I heard about a woman whose goal it is to get into the Guinness Book of World Records. She presently weighs over 600 pounds and wants to weigh over 1,000 pounds. She can't walk 20 feet now, but says she's healthy. She said running after her child has kept her weight down (running? seriously?). She's already in the book for being the fattest woman to give birth at 532 lbs. If she achieves this the GBoWR will, I'm sure put her photo in the book, and look, she's already getting press about this. This is just wrong on so many levels. That's press for someone cutting their life short. What's next, a world record for the most cigarettes smoked, the most alcohol consumed in a day?

- Kirstie Alley was on the Today Show this morning promoting her new reality show series 'Big Life' and her new for-sale WL program products ($1,700/one year membership and supplements). The woman is deep in WL denial.
---Meredith asked her if she'd thought about why she gained the weight back after her big bikini reveal on Oprah (2006)...She answered that no, she hasn't thought 'why', just 'did'...she 'did' gain the weight back and the two things her new WL plan (products for sale) help her with her cravings and hunger. Just the 'not thinking about why' and dealing with her emotional relationship with food (see yesterday's blog on awareness) means she's doomed for another regain IMO.
---I haven't been a long time yo-yoer like the tabloids say. I've only been fat four years of my life. Later in the interview she said her first weight gain was in the early '90's after a miscarriage (um, that's about 20 years ago, and her Oprah regain was over the next two years, so she's now been fat since 2008, so 2 years just from this latest yo-yo jump).
---Meridith asked what happened to her role with Jenny Craig and did they fire her/and were they mad at her? She answered that she didn't think they were mad at her and that she felt the split was mutual. Her explanation was that they wanted to go with a more serious commercial campaign and that she liked to have sillier/fun commercials. Um, did she really think anyone would believe that?
---She whined about how the press has hounded her since her first weight gain to sell papers, yet she's very publicly announced her attempt to start WL plans several times in the past and now, already did one show about her weight (I think it was called 'Fat Actress'?) and now another show. It's like telling people about your LB...you can't get mad then that those people are now asking/watching/reacting to your WL, or lack thereof. Also the WL experts agree that the stress and pressure she's under makes the WL even harder to come off...hmm 'stress and pressure' wasn't I just giving that same reason for not telling anyone about my LB at the beginning?
---Meredith asked what her goal weight is this time and she said that she always set her goal too low in the past...when she started her acting career she was 118 and so she set her goals at 120. She admits that 120 is probably not attainable now, so she has set her goal for 145. She's 5'8" and is very big busted. Um, we're almost the same height (1/2") and I'm flat chested and I can't see me reaching 145...I was VERY thin at that weight.
---Kirstie admitted getting off drugs in the past with a rehab program, and Meridith asked if she saw a correlation between the drug addiction and the food one. She was defensive that she doesn't use the word 'addiction', but 'compulsion' when it comes to food. She pointed out that you have to eat every day, it has nutrition benefits, and food is legal. Um, so is alcohol Kirstie, and doesn't red wine have benefits.

- Of course that got me thinking about Oprah as she was much thinner in the clip with Kirstie than she is now. Love Oprah, hate her thoughts on WL and the hypocrisy she spews about WL.
---I hate that's she's so solidly against WLS and then has one guest expert after another on losing weight the 'old fashioned way'...doesn't she see that she's no example of that?...she'd be better off not talking about weight at all IMO.
---The only thing that Oprah does successfully for people needing to lose weight is to make us feel better about her failure (especially those of us who have yo-yoed and/or tried everything like her). She publicly shows that you can have a raft of WL experts, books, exercise gurus and personal trainers, Medical Dr's., Nutritionists, WL Psychologist, and Private healthy chefs at your disposal and sometimes that's still not enough to keep the weight off successfully. Her example as a WL failure helped me when I reached my decision to finally allow myself to look at WLS.

I truly feel for these last two ladies, I've been them, well, without the celebrity part, although I do have the proper sunglasses. I just hate how it perpetuates the perception that the next 'diet' or 'exercise' plan that's around the corner will finally work and be our miracle. I do love that Oprah has owned her regain and is no longer blaming it on her thyroid, and she made a plan to start focusing on herself/putting her needs on the list. It's ironic though, one of the sayings that Oprah spouts out a lot is that life will keep giving you the same lesson until you learn that lesson...I would have loved to have seen her learn this one.

3/12/10 Endoscopy Schmendoscopy!

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2/15/10 I Hope You're Happy! (238 & 248 Heads)

...I am now going off into my corner to cry...

...and yes, there are three chins in that last pic (yes, I zoomed in close so you can just barely see it)...

...and yes, I was a brunette...for the first time in my life...for a few months...

...I had this fantasy that I would change my hair color and the weight wouldn't be as noticeable in my 'before' pics...

...I liked the additional brain cells brunettes have...they keep you from having stupid blonde moments...where you promise things you now have to deliver on...

...and I'm noticing (Why didn't any of my 'friends' point this out?) I need to buy a powder foundation instead of my liquid one...as I have 'Obese Woman with Shiny Face Syndrome' in every pic...never a good look...fat and sweaty looking...ughhh...

...that is all...

...unless I find way to block new followers I'll be in seclusion....

...Do Not Disturb

1/15/10 Friday Facts

STRESS:
-DH is stressed out at work..."worst day ever" yesterday.

-DD got laid off this week (and her BF of 3 years and she broke-up just before Christmas). She's also been sick as a dog for 3 days now (still running a fever...doc thinks it's a virus) "Mom, my life sucks". She's got a two year follow up procedure coming up on Monday (outpatient) and I'm hoping she's not still sick (and that the procedure can go on). Thank God her insurance goes through the month (yes, she'll buy ins. after that).

-DS1 called from college yesterday and thinks he has the swine flu (wouldn't get the shot, believe me I tried)...I'm waiting to see if he made it to the doc.

-DS2 is as happy as a lark...ski club trip tonight.

-Someone please tell me how to sleep better when you're stressed (DH and I are both not getting enough sleep)...and pray for me that I can stay up until 11:30pm to pick up DS2 tonight.

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Happy Weekend All!

1/13/10 The Economy Crashed My Party

Yesterday as I was enjoying my first day of everyone out of the house and was in the midst of my 80 lbs. party *bubble popping*

DD called me sobbing...she had just been laid-off (And might I just add...DON'T call your Mother during rush hour when you're normally supposed to be driving home sobbing so hard you can hardly talk...It gives us heart palpitations...I thought she'd been in a wreck). Poor kid…she was crushed. Unfortunately it’s a hard ‘life experience’ many of us have to learn sometime in our lives…cut-backs suck. Some days it's hard being the Mom...you just want to go through it for them and take away the pain.

I’ll be busy helping edit resumes and cover letters…and I’m back wearing that sandwich board sign on the corner for her; ‘Smart, Outgoing, Marketing and International Business Double-Major, Needs Work, Willing to Relocate (Mom and Dad will miss her at home…no, really)'.

It’s a gloomy day here…

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In response to Comments:

Thanks gals, lots of tears this week. I did do the 'this happened for a reason', but it didn't help. We're updating the resume today...

11/13/09 Water, Water, Everywhere...

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10/27/09 Goal Limbo

I'm coining a new phrase here on LBT. Because I'm going to need it. Soon. How many threads, posts, and blogs have you seen here about LB'ers who are getting close to goal (usually starting about 30 lbs. out from goal, depending on their BMI) and are facing a whole new set of challenges. Their BMI is lower, as is their weight. Although they're at their Sweet Spot the amount of food they can eat and still lose weight is no longer working for them. The same goes for exercise. Yeah, they've hit plateaus before, but that doesn't even come close to this…it's much worse…the weight loss stalls and slows down to a painful crawl…a death march even.

I'm paying more attention to all those '30 and Goal' posts (sounds like a football commentary, doesn't it?). They feel guilty for complaining or even asking for support here…How can they not feel guilty for even seeking support when they've lost a ton of weight and are now in clothes sizes they haven't seen in years…for some, since grade school? How can they justify needing support when others are struggling just to start losing their weight? After all, they're so close to goal…and look at all the newbies here just starting their 6 mo. diet…or those that are now in 'Bandster Hell' and are just trying so hard to maintain and wait for those fills. What right do they have to complain? They'd look like FOOLS for complaining! They've lost a ton of weight…they're almost at goal…they look better…they feel better…they are so happy with their weight loss…I'm with you…WHAT THE HECK DO THEY HAVE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT? Except…now…I'm almost there…

These Banders get that. They feel the same way…they feel happy and frustrated at the same time…they're happy with how far they've come, but they're frustrated with their slow progress getting those last 30 or so pounds off. Should they feel happy or sad? They don't even know how to feel about it…and it's not like the NSV's are still pouring in to make them feel good as they've now been this weight for awhile. Maybe they even feel a little like a failure and as though they've let others or themselves down with their slow weight loss. These Banders feel like they have to apologize for even complaining. Over and over they feel like they had to justify why they had a right to be frustrated at all.

So how do you go about explaining how horrible it feels being so close to goal and for your weight loss to stall. You lost the bulk of the weight at least somewhat steadily, but now the scale is barely moving and at this rate it might/is taking years to get to goal.


Those people generally get sympathy from others who are in the same position they are, or others that have already been through it (and we know there not as many 'old-timers' here…maybe this is why some disappear even?). Don't we all give great sympathy to those going through 'Bandster Hell'? It's because we've all been there.
I kept thinking…heck, when I was going through that period after banding and before restriction and I was feeling down and needed support all I had to say was 'I'm going through Bandster Hell' and I'd get all kinds of support…'Oh, I've been there too'… 'This is normal' … 'Don't worry it will end soon' … 'Try this…' Mention just two words 'Bandster Hell' and you need not have to explain any further…we get it…we sympathize.

Here's the thing…I've decided I'll need an acronym or at least a term for this period in my Band journey. If I can say PB, Slime, Stuck, or Bandster Hell and I don't need to explain or justify these terms and my being there, then why isn't there one for this tough, usually longest phase in the Band journey? I looked on several sites and there isn't one.

I need a term so that I can talk about this without having to give a lengthy explanation and justification each time…something like 'Bandster Hell'. I figure the best time to come up with this is even before I start into this phase. I don't need your support yet for this, because I'm not there yet, but I will be soon. I looked at words and I found one that really struck home…LIMBO, in limbo: a state of uncertainty or of being kept waiting; a state of oblivion or neglect; a condition of uneasiness or aprehension; a state or place of profound anxiety brought on by the unknown; indeterminate state; a condition of unknowable outcome. Well that works.

So I'm coining a new phrase for myself (and anyone else) here so I won't have to explain or justify why I need support. I'll soon be 30 lbs. or less from goal and I'm sure I'll need to continue getting support here. You'll read this phase name and you'll just nod your head and know exactly what I'm talking about and hopefully give me the support I'll still need (because if your not there yet, you know you soon will be). You'll understand that I have the right to be frustrated or upset because this phase of the journey brings its own set of challenges and it's own set of emotional issues. I'll need the same support you give all of us at any point in this journey. You see, I'm headed into that last phase of Weight Loss…and I may be there a LOOONG time so I'll need your patience and understanding. I'm headed into 'Goal Limbo'.

8/14/09 Taking the Bad with the Good

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7/27/09 Murphy and the Grad Party- Part I

Sorry, I've been gone from here for 10 days, so it's a two part blog.

Murphy's Law: "If something can go wrong, it will"…seems to be the theme of my life the last few weeks. Nothing traumatic, just life picking on me again. I, however, have survived and am victorious…well, sort'a. As you know I've been preparing for DS1's HS graduation party yesterday…and you've heard me whining about trying to make the DVD slideshow of his pics. It was going slowly, but I was learning and slowly but surely I rummaged through my half-unorganized photos and managed to sort them by year (quite the feat), scan, crop, and individually save about 500 photos. Then Muphy's Law kicked in…it went something like this…(or you can skip this part and just know that I'm severely technologically impaired.).

- My program was an older version of the one my Sis (middle one) had and trained me on…this caused some great difficulties figuring it out and a few items my program couldn't do.

- Imported a large group of photos into the slideshow program (Movie Maker)…it mixed them all up…had to move them back into chronological order and by then the originals were back in the albums or boxes in a jumbled mess. Remember, I've got 'old-timers' (as my kids say) and I can't remember what I did 5 min. ago let alone what year a pic was taken…I'm sure I guessed some of the years wrong, but no baby pics in the teen years LOL...it was 'close enough'.

- Set a group of about half the photos into a new folder after they were done, went back to the slideshow and the photos were now just big red "X's". After much hysterics…well…it took some undoing.

- After importing about 200 photos the slideshow program decided to slow down and continued to do so as I went…by number 500 there was a 30 second delay between each click on my mouse and when finalizing the transitions it would freeze the computer every 15 min. or so…VERY slow going.

Yes, I was ready to lose my mind, but I was determined to win the battle and finally, last weekend I finished…it was beautiful…13 pieces of music…500 pics…cool transitions…even a title and ending! Now, all that was left was to burn the DVD's! Murphy's Law again…

- I read the notes from the training with Sis, and realized I now needed to import the whole thing into yet another program…problem was, I didn't have the program. DH and I spent last Saturday downloading other programs online and trying to burn the DVD with them to no avail.

- I finally admitted defeat and called Sis. Three hours later and many attempts later we figured out my older version could burn straight from there, but my problem was I didn't have enough RAM to do this with such a big slideshow.

- I'll wrap this up by telling you that I had to save all the photos and copy them onto DS1's new college computer we bought him for graduation (after many promises that I wouldn't blow anything up). Then…yes…I had to REDO the whole slideshow program again from music to photo transitions. I'll just say that I had Sis in hysterics laughing at all the things that had gone wrong…the only thing that hadn't happened was the computer completely crashing.

The only thing that saved me from chucking the whole thing was the fact that DS1's computer is lightning fast and had the newer version of the program on it…well, that and the fact that I had a slideshow for DD's graduation (one where all I did was scan the pics and paid to have the rest done…money WELL spent folks) so of course DS1, and everyone else was expecting one.

On to the next fun part of my last week. My second big job for the party was the quilt…you know the one where I've been saving all my kids T-shirts from every sport/activity they've been in since they were a tot and made them into a quilt…I put bands of white canvas between the T-shirt squares and at the party everyone takes a sharpie and writes messages/signs the quilt there. Well, after the DVD's were finally burned last Monday morning I got back to working on this…thought I'd have weeks to do the quilt as the DVD was only going to take a few days after the scanning part…HA HA. I had most of the shirts cut and started piecing in the canvas. I was zipping along happily and was finally thinking that I'd be able to get caught up and finally start working on the food and other parts of the party. Yep, Murphy's Law again…(or you can skip this part and just know that I'm cursed).

- The belt that drives my 53 year old Brother sewing machine broke…well, it didn't just break…it looked like the rubber had been rotting slowly for years and now it was in pieces. Yes, I screamed...Did you hear me on Tuesday?

- Many phone calls later the only tidbit of help I got from any store was a name of a store about an hour away where they might be able to fix it if I brought it in and left it for their repair guy….but that would take at least a week.

- More phone calls to every friend and neighbor…do you realize that no one sews anymore? Not a single soul I could find had a portable sewing machine.

- I admitted defeat and called Sis again (more sympathetic laughter) and she agrees to pick up Mom's portable and bring it on Friday when she arrives a day early to help me with the party.

On to Part II....

7/17/09 Onederland is a Tease!

I've been super busy; I'm tired and there's no end in site. I haven't had my shower yet and I need more coffee. I'm getting ready for DS1's huge graduation party a week from Saturday and I'm running behind on things. It's been a super busy summer and I got a late start on things. The house is a wreck (I've been in the basement, so a tornado must have come through here…no other explanation) and I haven't started buying the food and supplies yet.

After finding out my DVD-slideshow lady is no longer in business I decided to tackle the project myself (with some tutoring from middle sister). The slideshow set to music runs in a loop in the garage where the buffet will be set up so people can view it for a short time or as long as they want while they're getting their food (It's almost ½ hour long…almost 500 pics). Yesterday I went downstairs right after breakfast to finish scanning pics and didn't come up until dinnertime (never could have skipped lunch before the band!). I even forgot to drink any water until the evening…I was 'in the zone'…gulped down three big glasses after dinner…yeah, I was up three times in the night. I do have the music all loaded, clipped and transitioned. Can't believe I still have some pics left to scan today. It would have helped if all the photos were organized and in albums, but only about ½ are…we still have some that are just on CD's and some that are sitting on our 5 scan discs…I hate all you scrapbookers that have every event in an album and with cute decorations too. My three sister's/Mom keep trying to get me sucked in with all their rolling bags filled with cute scrapbook stuff, but I'm avoiding that cult like the plague. I wouldn't be a good devotee as I can't even seem to get my pics developed.

As my neighbor friends have pointed out, I set the bar too high with DD's HS Grad Party. Why did I have to do the slideshow in chronological order (real fun when you have pics sitting in boxes unmarked). My sister was smart…pull a pic out and scan it, who cares what order or if you even miss a year? Why did I have to make a giant quilt for friends to writ messages/autograph (I use T-shirts I've been saving from each of them from every sport, workplace, event they were in and put white borders around the T-shirt squares for people to write messages…framed in black and quilted). I HAVEN'T EVEN BOUGHT THE FABRIC YET FOR DS1's!!! Stop snickering!!! I happen to hate sewing…no patience for it. So what am I doing here instead of getting busy on those pics? Well, one word…ONEDERLAND…I'm NOT there!

I've been up and down the same 3 pounds this week and I've been eating like a bird…probably too little, some days maybe too much, but I don't have time to track things right now. My next fill isn't for another week and a half so I'm just hanging in there. This morning was the kicker though…200.5…the closest I've gotten yet. I was thinking 'Comon! Give a girl a break, like I don't have enough stress! Can't you give a girl one measly pound?!'

I know, it's been another WhineFest…sorry. Off to finish the DVD….if you don't see me in a few days send a search party down to the basement computer as I've probably shriveled up and keeled over (Just let my friends here know I finally reached Onederland)!

7/8/09 Highs and Lows

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5/14/09 Bandster Rules

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